LHC@home

A lot of people have been worried about mini black holes causing trouble, but in reality, they can be beneficial.

Zero emission vehicles: just attach a mini black hole to the tail pipe, and no more smog, no more CO2.

A better vacuum cleaner. Throw out your old Dyson vac, and get a mini black hole vac. It\'ll really suck the dirt out of the carpet, and there\'s no dust bin to empty out.

Garbage disposal - just have a mini black hole under the sink - no more need to take out the trash. And no more need for landfills either.

Make the work day go by faster. Bring a mini black hole to your cubicle, and put in a 1 hour day. Due to time dilation, 8 hours will have passed in the rest of the company, and you can then go home.
You can even use one in the car to make the commute go by faster.

They attract members of the opposite sex!*
* Gravitational attraction. (Caution: they attract larger people even more)

Diet pill. If you have one in pill form, it will eat your food for you, so you can enjoy all the dessert you can eat and not worry about getting fat.

Tunneling - attach one to the front of a Tunnel boring machine and it will cut out a clean circular tunnel without having to replace cutters.

So, there you have it. Seven ways that mini black holes can make your life better.

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I'm not the LHC Alex. Just a number cruncher like everyone else here.